Are Your Still Attracted To Your Ex

Women’s typically keep their mouth shut even if they are still attracted to their ex or have some strings attached to them. Many women are seen denying it completely but you know the fact somewhere in your heart. Well this can be discussed in two parts – Firstly, Are you attracted even now long after your break up to your ex and hence how do you identify it. Secondly, if you are how you can get over it.

Do you from time to time, think about your ex and get lost in the happy times you had. Does thinking about your ex still stir emotion in you like anger, a vow for revenge or emotional bout of tears? Are you talking raving mad about your ex to your friends even now?

Where does that leave you, simply saying that your ex is still holding a dear place in your heart and mind? We would say if he or she has moved on, you are silly sitting around thinking of them. Not that we don’t understand break ups can be tough but you have to get over it sometime, why not now. Most of the times, a person does not give getting over their ex a conscious shove hence, they still string along with emotion from break up.

How can you get over your ex? Do you still have his/her phone number, email address, address, letters, emails? Do not hang on to all this, they are just tagging on your heart strings. Delete or lose them intentionally or you will always feel like clinging on.

You may cherish good times together but make a point to not think about it every day. If it crops up in your mind, let it run its course. Make an effort to socialize, do not jump in to another relationship but give yourself time, make friends and do not tell them of the disappointment or the issue will exist in conversation even there.

When we say time heals a break up, we mean it. A sudden relationship will only act like a transactional relationship. Hence stay friends and when you feel you have overpowering emotions for another, get in to a relationship.

With old friends, stop the discussion of the topic. It’s tough but you might as well do it.  Have fun, do spontaneous trips, get a new look and change a few things.

Does it make you feel that if you meet your ex again it will send you swirling back in to the pool of requited love? Make sure you give yourself enough time and space before you go any near. Though when we say this, do not prepare for the day, instead let life take its course.

If you feel you have emotional baggage from the relationship, find means to give it up, get counseled or try mediation. For some people these means work. Lastly if are tired of the nagging feeling of one sided love, make a conscious effort and you will get over it, give it time.

I would love to hear your experiences or opinion on this. Please leave me a comment and let me know.

How to Cope Up With Loveless Marriage

Love is a hard thing to maintain throughout life. While love marriages start with love it is not necessary that the couple stay in love forever. At some point in love marriages people start feeling suffocated, all the things which seemed thrilling earlier, now start seeming like unbearable.  Arranged marriages on the other hand may not start with love but once in love, it may help to keeps it going.

A lot of times people fall out of love or let a certain incident or disappointment break their relationship. If you were in love and now have fallen out of love or are good friends but do not feel an intense love for each other, make a few efforts to keep it amicable if not fiery.

Commit & create your rules
Every couple makes their own rules. There are things that create a barrier; there are things that hurt either partner. Being in a loveless marriage should at least settle on caring for either other’s opinion. For all you know along the way you give chance to your marriage. A loveless marriage can always be revived but it has to be both the partners working for it. Loveless can be amiable but not unbearable. An unbearable marriage will only meet divorce and hating.

Stay friends – Communicate
It is not necessary that you love each other with the same intensity as before. Though such would be perfect but if you feel it has dwindled down, make sure you maintain communication. A dead end is not worth it. Do not discuss topics that don’t really help, instead explore new things together or talk about things like you are friends, ask, tell. It shows that you care or at least are not interested in things just being the way they are. What do you know, at times your partner might just need a helping hand from your end?

Communication left too long can bridge gaps, talk things out.

Do not be rash
Though we have suggested you talk, make sure you don’t get to throwing words and statements around. If things haven’t been pleasant lately, do not push them. Know when to say what in case you lose your temper due to frustration and anger.

Its often we regret what we say in the heat of the moment later. Be wise and think before you speak. You may think the damage repairable but what if your partner takes it badly? Keep your cool while any heated discussions and put your point across diplomatically or better yet, wait for when things have cooled down.

Either move forward by forgiving and forgetting or stop short of destruction.
It’s often that a loveless marriage is because a couple marries for convenience or maybe they are amiable but do not share the intensity of desire or worse, because of an incident that was wrong on a partner’s part. Contemplate if you can live by forgiving if not forgetting or is it ok for you to let go of a relationship for that one incident? Totally your call, but while you may hold it as a grudge, you can still remain friends or maintain civilized mannerism.

A lot couples suffer loveless marriages yet it is not tough to live like companions rather than lovers. If you can do, why not give it a shot? Good Luck!

I would love to hear your experiences or opinion on how to cope up with loveless marriage. Please leave me a comment and let me know.

Top 10 Tips for a Successful Courtship

A courtship the bridge you have to climb before you say your ‘I dos’. Courtship’s are not just limited to love marriages but even applicable to arranged marriages.  A courtship can be vital which helps both the partners to explore each other, understand different aspects of their lives, likings, disliking, hobbies, nature and most importantly knowing the person you are about to marry to his/her 100% without the pressure of marital status.

Often courtship’s can form the dearest memorabilia for couples and a story to tell their grandchildren. Also, it can lay down a solid foundation for the couple which can eventually lead to a successful married life. Are you contemplating a courtship? or are at the ceremonial line of one? Here the top 10 tips for a successful courtship. By all means you can seduce your partner in a mental, emotional and physical way. Following are some rules which can help, few people might not agree with these but in long term these things will really prove vital.

Know the Person You Want To Marry
By this rule we mean, know who you want to marry and only indulge in courtship with that person. If you are still thinking about a fling or do not want to give it a shot with a prospective groom or bride brought forward say no rather than quitting half way.

The First Impression
Take care with this physical appearances and take care to not step on someone’s toes by saying something. This one can last a life time and you want to remember and cherish it together.

Do Not Hurry In To Intimacy
Everything has its time. Emotional as well as physically, it can take a while before you open up or want to be together. If you were to ask us a question, we would say emotional should come before physical but that may not always happen in the order.

Share
Important – Important, in talks, thoughts, things, feelings. Sharing and communicating is what forms the rock of your relationship. You don’t want to go a mile before erecting this one.

Flirt
This is an important one. An art, it can stroke some fire in the courtship and keep it from going dull.

Voice Your Opinion
Who are you and how do you think? This is likely to happen when you talk but if you had initially taken care of not saying a few things, do show your personality or the other person may be confused at who are after marriage.

Take Up Any Lingering Issues
You may have talked, communicated how you feel, you are now a solid with each other. Sometimes there are things that cannot be said at the very beginning and require a trust to be formed. Rather than bring out any lingering issues after married, face the tough waters if you must tell each other something.

Romance
Wine and dine each other as much as you like. A courtship should not be dull. If you need to make things larger than life to enjoy doing so as no one will blame you.

Think a Loud About the Future
We suggest this so that you can know what the things you both want are. Thinking out loud will tell you what you want and what the other person may not want. A courtship can give you both time to adjust and think over what you want together.

Give Each Other Space
The good thing about a courtship is that you are not yet staying together. While physical space is necessary, make sure you give each other mental and emotional space too. For a lot of couples today, living in before is an option. To make it work, giving each other space is necessary.

I would love to hear your courting ideas, please leave me a comment and let me know.

What Is Actual Romance For A Woman

As women, we are always spoon-fed ideas of what romance ought to be. We buy into candlelight dinners, red roses, dark chocolates, opening doors, sunsets from a quiet rooftop and Valentine’s Day. Equally, men are often trained or pressured into performing these expected tasks to qualify as romantics.

I’m old-fashioned, I like chivalry, I like attention and I like being spoilt. But any man who thinks this is all it takes to woo a woman, be warned. This comes with an expiry date.

When a relationship is new, women enjoy these little gestures and there is absolutely nothing wrong with unconditional chivalry. But a few years into the relationship, she might actually find a romantic dinner in a swish restaurant sipping champagne, making small talk and wearing a tight, uncomfortable dress whilst a huge market profits from her emotional expectations not really that romantic. At the risk of sounding like a middle-aged feminist cynic, I think roses and candles are the nursery school of romantics.

What is actual romance for a woman? It is when your loved one is able to keep the “spark” lit even as the years go by. We live in a world where almost every man has been conditioned into looking at a woman from the outside, to judge her appearance, and her “lady-like” behavior, so it’s only natural that we women want to be seen from the inside. A woman wants the freedom to express her darkest feelings and the most unconventional thoughts.

What men often do not realize is that women can also have days when they want to physically break something, pick their noses, eat a gigantic steak or roam around the house in a torn T-shirt. We have days when we use bad language in frustration, when we are insensitive to men’s needs, when we need to be left alone.

The importance of romance for a woman is to feel just as accepted, just as loved when she is behaving unconventionally. This romance requires a little more perception and depth than chivalry because it means men taking a step back when we are angry. Sometimes romance is as simple as a man staying by our side when the whole world sits in judgment. Other times, romance means physically letting us leave and sort out problems by ourselves. To do this, a man requires immense self-control because he needs to let go of that instinctive male tendency to protect, provide and possess his woman. He needs to let go of that male ego we women keep complaining about.

When a man trusts a woman completely, lets her go and waits patiently for her to return, without questioning her loyalty, it is true romance. And it’s not something you learn from a glossy magazine. Or buy at a mall.

How To Understand A Man’s Love & Affection

It’s a fact that men do not express their feelings right away as they are quite shy of showing their emotions. Fortunately, you can still understand their feelings and emotions via body signs and signals. Women have a knack of  understanding men’s signals (even  a minute behavior) so read on and learn how to understand what’s going on inside your man’s mind. I will try to break a man’s love in 4 stages from infatuation a stage when he is totally ready to commit.

Early Attraction


In the beginning most forward guys will look for an excuse to feel your touch, will try to appreciate your skin, body or hairs, unless he is a shy person who is afraid of loosing you. Unless he is a total jerk, he will be extremely nervous and conscious about his behavior and thinking about how you are going to react. You can straight away judge his nervousness as he must be running his hands through hair or start licking his lips more often. Non first timers may use their verbal skills crafted perfectly to please and impress you by hiding their true emotions.

Falling In Love

Once, the guy develops some feeling for you he will introduce ‘his world’. He will stare deeply in your eyes and a cute smile that follows is enough to tell you that he is falling for you. Suddenly, you will become part of his activities and life and you are invited for movies, TV, games, shows etc. He will skip time with his guy friends just to be with you. He will start introducing you with his close friend and you will certainly become part of his daily life. Apart from that you will notice more gesture of touching, and other public displays of affection – gentling brushing your hair behind the ears or stroking your cheeks, holding you by waist etc. Even a dumb can understand his feelings but sometimes casual friendship is often confused with these signs.

Fallen Madly In Love With You

When a guy is totally & madly in love you and hasn’t proposed yet, you will notice that every simple talks are redirected to romantic chats. He will turn head over heels, just for you and do whatever to be with you. When a guy is totally in love he will leave even his favorite stuff to be with you and will try to keep you happy all the time (best thing about romance isn’t it?) You will notice a slight descend in showing public affection or hugs but this is just temporary stuff. He will listen you more and try to judge your feelings a lot. In simpler words he may appear to be more of chatter, but the touchy feel will descend a lot. Don’t confuse it with withdrawal it’s just what guys do as they don’t want to hurt our feelings, thinking that this is not what we want.

He Is Ready For Commitment

Frankly speaking if a man is foreseeing his future with your he will give you all signals from much in advance and will treat you like his partner. He will ask your opinion on important stuff, his work, his personal life, issues etc. You will feel a sudden appreciation in your man’s eyes for the work you do. All of a sudden your feedback will become the most important advice. At this stage he will share less with your as he has already share everything with you already in his mind. You will notice that if you tilt your head to left, he’ll do his to right to meet your gaze. The bond Is henceforth, so strong, he’ll try to imitate you subconsciously.

I would love to hear your experiences and views on understanding signals and signs of your man’s love. Please leave me a comment and let me know.